Before I became a parent there were many things I wouldn’t dream of saying, things such as ‘Please stop drinking out of your brothers potty’ or ‘Don’t scratch your bum then sniff your finger’ Today another little gem occurred when Gareth said ‘ Freddie please stop drinking off the table’ After Freddie has spilt his drink all over the table then proceeded to lick it off like a cat! So I took to some of my favourite bloggers and asked them. “What are the things you never thought you would hear yourself say? “
Here’s what they had to say …
Emma from Ready Freddie Go – Mine is a Freddie too.. “Freddie don’t put your willy through the stairgate”
Hannah from The Amphletts -‘Noah get your head out of the rubbish bin!”
Katie from Mummy’s Diary – I constantly have to keep telling both my 4 and 3-year-old to take their heads out of the cat flap! They either do it to see if it’s raining so they can go out and play or if I’m out there and there not or just to terrorise the crap out of the cat!
Beth from Twinderelmo – “You aren’t supposed to sit on the playhouse roof”
Clare from Clare’s Little Tots – “Get your hands out of the toilet / bin please”. Something I never had to say to my 5-year-old girl…her brother on the other hand
Jayne from Sticky Mud and Belly Laughs – Why is the dog wearing Spider-man pants?
Kate from Counting To Ten – “Thank you, but I can wipe my own bottom”
Nikki from Yorkshire Wonders – “Don’t put your finger up the cat’s bum”
Becky from 3 Princesses and 1 Dude – ‘Stop picking your sisters nose!’
Nicola from The Mummy Monster – “Take your willy out of that bottle!!” My son is a nightmare with his willy!! He just can’t leave it alone!!
Jenny from Monkey and Mouse – ‘Don’t smite your brother!’ This was uttered a lot this morning! I blame Maui in Moana for saying it!
Emma from Mummy Em Blog – “Stop licking the bus window”
Cat from Rock and Roll Pussycat – “Eli is that poo or a raisin? Eli have you put the poo in your mouth!?” 🤤
Jade from Jade’s Journey – My 5-year-old said the other day ” Eryn is eating the dog” I look and there she is licking the dog with a mouth full of hair
Emma from Free From Farmhouse – Oh, so many!…’Please stop licking the windows’ was a common one for a while! ‘Don’t play with your penis at the dinner table’
Collette from Truly Madly Cuckoo – Don’t play sword fighting with your palm cross! (in church on palm Sunday!)
Paula from Hot Mess Mummy – I once found myself saying ‘We’ve got too many giraffe’s in this house’
Kerry from Kerry Shaw Mummy of Four – “Play with your own willies!” To my two-year-old twin boys.
Sophie from Life as Mrs D – “Stop trying to pull your tongue out, it’s attached and won’t come out!” And “you didn’t finish your dinner, so you don’t get to eat crap off the floor”
Louise from WeeOhana – Just the other day Dylan and his sister were in the bath .. I had to shout “Dylan stop peeing on your sister!”
Ryan from Dads App – Mine would be ‘please stop eating the… Play Doh/Chalk/Crayons/Lipstick/Raw Potatoes/Candles/Baby Wipes’ or basically anything she’s not meant to eat.
As you can see becoming a parent is completely and utterly a lovely non-gross experience! haha , Thank you to everyone who joined in, these have given me a proper belly giggle this afternoon!
If you enjoy a good toddler story why don’t you check out my Toddler love story , its a warm and fuzzy one 😉
Thanks for reading