I went pole dancing!

When you think of pole dancing, what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Pretty girls in lacy underwear swinging gracefully around it? Men in strip clubs? As a whole pole dancing doesn’t have the best reputation.

I heard through the grapevine that it is actually a really great form of exercise and great for strengthening. As well as being extremely fun so I really wanted to give it a try. Baring in mind I’m a uk size 16 I’m not a small girl so never thought I would actually pluck up the courage to do it!

The beginning

I’d noticed a post for a company called Liberty Pole Dance Academy on Facebook about pole dance fitness classes and shared it. One of my friends Trisha spotted it and mentioned that she had always wanted to try it too. So a session was booked. There was no backing out now.

My first thoughts upon booking it was, Is that pole going to be able to hold this fat ass? What if I’m just too big for it? Maybe I’m just not strong enough. However Trisha is a very energetic and her zest for life is extremely contagious so I knew I’d just have to suck it up , put my ( extremely) big girl pants on and get on with it.

The studio

I’m not entirely sure exactly what I was expecting when I turned up but what I can tell you I wasn’t expecting was to find a beautiful dance studio complete with fairy lights!

As we entered I was a little apprehensive. There was a sign asking us to use the hand santiser upon entering due to the current covid-19 situation. We were then asked to fill out some medical forms and a special form with regards to the virus before being advised to take off our shoes and the class would start.

The warm up

The session was started with a warm up. This involved lots of stretching and some squats! Squats hurt and I commented how I was aching already when we hadn’t even done anything!

For a split second I felt like I’d been transported back to 1989 in Mr Evans PE class. Rolling my shoulders backwards and forward the only thing missing was the chariots of fire music he always used to play.

Walking the pole

After warming up it was time to start learning. The first thing we were taught was how to walk around the pole. Now I have to point out about now that I am not, nor have ever been remotely sexy or elegant so if you picture an elephant on tip toes stomping round it will probably give you some image of what I looked like.

Sally the instructor demonstrated how we should do it and I couldn’t help but just stand and watch in awe as she gracefully tip toed around the pole with ease. With crossing our feet in front of each other than gliding round the pole, we very quickly picked it up. Shock , Horror I can be graceful!

Sliding down

Get your minds out of the gutter! I know you’re sat there chuckling about sliding down poles and if you wasn’t you are now 😉

Again Sally demonstrated how you could elegantly wrap your hands around the pole before placing your leg out in front of you and slowly sliding your back down and ending up on the floor.

Now, I’m not going to lie, I watched her and immediately thought ” I’m going to wrap my hands around that pole go to slide down it and just fall down and give myself a dead arse”

Shockingly it turns out that I’m actually quite good at sliding down poles. ( stop sniggering!) I had this in the bag!

Being sexy!

After mastering how to slide down the pole the next thing to learn was how to get up from the floor using sexiness and elegance. Again I am neither!

Sliding first one foot out, then the other before sticking her bum in the air. Followed by her boobs and head Sally was just amazing! There was absolutely no way in this world I was going to be able to even get my feet out let alone stand up and be sexy!

I was wrong AGAIN! I easily managed to do exactly what I was instructed and thought for a split second that there was hope for me after all!

Spinning around

Next up was spins! now we’ve all seen it on films, tv shows and some people in real life. These people make it look so easy to glide around the pole like they’re on some kind of carousel. Let me assure you this wasn’t the case for me!

Whilst Trisha seemed to be a complete natural at spinning around her pole, I on the other hand just couldn’t do it! No matter how hard I tried, how many attempts I had. I just couldn’t seem to lift my feet off the floor!

Head Stand

When I was about 10 I was like the world champion of headstands. I could be up there for hours. One thing I have never done however is a headstand against a pole!

Our hands had to be placed into a triangle ( this is not a natural position or a head stand when you think you usually have your hands apart) before placing our heads down , taking a step towards the pole and pushing ourselves up.

Surprisingly on my second attempt I was up! Here I was at the ripe old age of 38 doing a headstand against a pole that was rested neatly between my bum cheeks and it felt amazing! Maybe I could actually be good at this pole dancing

Warm down

All too soon it was time to start stretching and warming down before ending the session. We were shown how to stretch the different muscle in particular our arms and shoulders. After all they had just spent the last hour holding our body weights. The pole was used during the warm down too. Somehow making it feel easier because you had something to lean against.

Overall view

From the start to the end every single part of the experience was exciting and fun. Our instructor was extremely encouraging and even on the parts we felt we couldn’t do she cheered us on and helped us get through it.

I genuinely feel like I worked out more in 1 hour of pole dancing than I do in an hour and a half at the gym!

My legs are covered in bruises but every single one was worth it. Once I’m in a better financial position I will definitely be returning! I can see how pole dancing can become extremely addictive and fun!

Thanks for reading

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