Today has been what can only be described as f*cking horrible, awful, soul-destroying, hard, down heartening. Tough. I have been called fat not once but twice!
Now don’t get me wrong I am fat, In fact I am over 15 stone of fat and more than aware of it but I am also working bloomin hard to become fitter and healthier.
I have done nothing but try to improve my health and weight recently by joining the gym, going to clubbercise, swimming and eating healthily and to be called fat is just like a big kick in the teeth. Ironically until I actually started working out and losing weight I was NEVER called fat by anyone but I guess that will be because before I used to smoke so that was the go to thing to give me abuse for and now I don’t smoke they have to go to the next thing.
Fat Shame number 1
The first fat shaming I got was walking into the hospital. As I was walking along and checking my paperwork to make sure I was in the right place someone shouted out of their car window “F*cking Fat B*tch” now as much as I would like to think they weren’t talking to me I was the only person around at the time.
I have a couple of things to say to that person. Firstly yes I am fat but I can diet and I would rather that than have the disgraceful personality or attitude that you have. Secondly you have no idea what so ever why I was entering that hospital. I could have been going to see a very sick family member, one of my children, had an extremely important appointment and it could have been something serious. As it happens it was just a check up from my Essure Procedure but never the less you had no idea what was going on in my life or with me today whilst you were shouting abuse out of your window.
Fat Shame number 2
I went to the doctors as recently I have been really struggling to move after sitting or lying down for a long period of time. I assume that it is from all of the lumbar punctures I have received and I am genuinely a little concerned that it may have caused some serious damage. Anyway I went to the doctors who told me it was absolutely nothing to do with my lumbar punctures as it was in the wrong place ( I disagree, I know exactly where I had my lumbar punctures and where the pain is) anyway he said that my back was going into muscle spasm and that was causing the pain. He then decided to weigh me and turned all the attention off my bad back and onto the fact that I was overweight.
He told me everything I do is wrong, right down to the amount of exercise I do in the gym and recommended that I take up pilates. I eat wrong, exercise wrong , you name it I do it wrong I actually left there got in the car and just broke down in tears. I was vlogging my day so you can see some of how my day went by watching that, I promise there aren’t loads of snot bubbles!
Anyway I dealt with the whole thing the way I do best…. I got home thought about it all and despite every ounce of me saying f*ck it eat loads of cake I got ready and went to the gym and took all of my frustrations out there, then I had a bath …
From me to everyone who is doubting me or is putting me down WATCH THIS SPACE!!!! I love nothing more than proving people wrong!
We are extremely lucky in the fact that we live literally 5 minutes away from the Ironbridge. I still find it fascinating that people come from all over the world to look at our little bridge but it is incredibly beautiful down there. We had noticed that one of the well-known restaurants had been given a lot of stick recently so wanted to go to try it out for ourselves. Despite the fact they had a lower rating, Our family and friends all said how much they loved to dine there and how amazing their food was so we decided to go and check out the Pondicherry restaurant for ourselves.
We made our way from the car park across the road to the restaurant which actually used to be a police station. We walked into the building and was greeted by a nice young gentleman who was dressed smartly and extremely polite. He showed us to a side room that was absolutely beautiful with a couple of tables and a fireplace before asking if we would like any drink whilst we waited for our table. We said we would just wait and it wasn’t long at all before he came back to ask us to follow him to our seats.
I noticed that there was both an upstairs and a downstairs to the restaurant and it turns out that the downstairs are the old police cells and are available to hire for private functions. I was secretly a little disappointed that we didn’t get to see them but never the less we were led up the stairs to the restaurant area. The stairs leading up to the restaurant were quite steep and tricky for Freddie ( our 3-year-old) to walk up.
Our table was situated in a little side alcove and was lovely and private meaning that we were a little less conscious of the noise that the smaller children were making. It was past their bedtime so they didn’t really like being out of the house meaning for a mischievous Freddie climbing on the seats ( despite being told a hundred times to get down ) and a tired and grumpy baby who just wanted to go to bed.
We were handed some poppadoms and sauces to enjoy whilst we looked through the menu and made our choices.
The waiter came over and took our drinks order before returning and asking for our order. The poor guy had been sent away a couple of times due to us trying to contain the little ones but eventually we were ready to order. We decided against ordering for the younger 3. Bethie was quite happy munching on her poppadoms , Freddie could eat some of ours and Annabelle is very fussy and would only eat the salad
Ellie & I both chose the Chicken Pakora, We have eaten this several times from takeaways so knew that we both liked it. I thought mine was delicious , sometimes when I have had Pakora I’ve found it to be a little dry however this was cooked perfectly, the sauce that came with it was also tasty. I was pleasantly surprised to see fruit in with the salad. This isn’t something I have seen before so the grapes and kiwi were a nice surprising touch. Ellie said she thought it was really nommy ( nommy is good for those who don’t speak Ellie) She also thought it was a nice spice, not too spicy but the flavour was there, she also liked the fact that there was fruit in the salad.
Harry chose the Spicy Chicken Chat, He enjoyed it however was a little shocked that it came on a bone as every other time he has had Chicken Chat it has come as smaller pieces. He is not a big fan of chicken on the bone so was a little bit disappointed, the flavours were great but he felt there wasn’t a lot of chicken on there.
Gareth chose the Tikka Murgh ” It is the best starter I have ever had ” Gareth thought the chicken was cooked perfect, it wasn’t dry and the flavours were incredible. The mushrooms were delicious , the flavours were so nice you couldn’t even tell that you were eating mushrooms.
We all tasted each others starters and Freddie ate his body weight in chicken. He couldn’t get enough.
Our waiter arrived to remove the plates and asked if we would like to take a break between our starters and our mains but as Bethie was still incredibly grumpy we decided that we should continue with our meal straight away.
Harry & Ellie chose the Chicken Tikka Masala , ” Delicious & Amazing, I loved the pyramid rice and the flavours although I wasn’t so sure on the texture ” Said Harry.
Ellie said ” It tasted nice with very strong flavours, the naan bread was extremely nice and the rice tasted very fresh ”
Annabelle chose the Tandoori Chicken Tikka which came out on a sizzling platter. I was actually really impressed that the waiter made sure that it was a safe distance from her and also opened the window next to Annabelle so that she wasn’t covered in the smoke from the sizzling plate. She said ” It wasn’t too spicy but had a nice spice. I liked the curry sauce with the chips and made a chip butty with the naan bread, chips and curry sauce. The salad was fresh”
I chose the Murgh Makhani and when ordering my meal I asked the waiter to check with the chefs if it contained coconut ( I have a mild allergy) the waiter returned stating that they do use coconut powder however they could leave it out from my meal but it would leave my sauce a little less thick. I was actually really impressed with this as it just shows how fresh the meals were if they were able to do that. My meal was creamy and extremely tasty. The chips were fresh and homemade which makes a nice change from the frozen chips you are normally presented with. The naan bread was possibly the best naan bread I have ever had and I have had lots of naan bread!
Gareth chose the Karachi Chilli Chicken, when I asked him what he thought of his meal he said “I had the chill chicken, everything on the plate looked amazing, the chicken was tender with the right amount of kick to it with the rice being light and flavourful. Nom nom nom ”
We loved the fact that it was a transformed old police station and it gave the restaurant a real exciting character. The staff were very attentive and checked regularly to see if everything was OK with our meals without being invasive. The restaurant itself was clean and tidy and the food looked and tasted very fresh.
I would happily return and eat there again and would definitely recommend it to friends and family so if you are staying in Ironbridge check it out. However I wouldn’t choose to take the children again but this is due to the time it opens and nothing to do with the service we received with them being there. It is a little more pricey than what we would normally pay but I think the price is reflected in the freshness of the food and the fantastic customer service.
Thanks for reading while you’re here why don’t you check out some of our other local restaurant reviews
I wrote the other day to let you all know that myself and Gareth had decided to split. Life wasn’t fun and we were constantly arguing or if we weren’t arguing then we just weren’t talking. We had a massive distance between us and despite the best intentions and efforts it just wasn’t working out. It’s all making complete sense now.
1 Week on and it’s becoming clearer.
After a LOT of talking between myself and Gareth we have now discovered that it was just a case of the wrong timing. Despite the fact that we love each other very much we both and rightly so put the children before us. But in fact by doing that we lost our relationship and lost ourselves along the way. I spoke about it a while ago and how we were trying to find ourselves.
During our talks it has come out that we actually had a lot of underlying issues and it turns out it was the right time to split and to concentrate on ourselves and our children for a while. After all you can’t find room to fully love someone else until you can love yourself and neither of us have been overly happy with ourselves.
There is a future!!!
we are both VERY hopeful that there will be a future between us. In fact we both feel closer than we have ever been. I would go as far as saying we are closer now than we were at the beginning and the biggest part of that is the fact that instead of ignoring issues, or just arguing over them. We have actually sat down and listened to each other, we’ve sat and discussed everything and where we feel things have changed, where we feel we have changed as people and we are looking to the future.
We are still split and we are still unsure of what the future holds but we are talking which is far more than we have been doing in the past. We are spending a lot of time as a family, laughing , enjoying each others company and being around the children without any pressures. I hope that once we have fixed ourselves as individuals that we can then become an incredible couple.
I have been using the Doodle Mouse for about a week now, as you may know I am a tech geek and can tell if a piece of technology is good or not. After about 10 minutes of using it I knew I was going to get along nicely with it.
I personally love the doodle design on the mouse it has a bunch of different doodles on the top with vibrant colours. This makes it stand out and makes your computer desk / office stand out. The mouse comes with a pack of stickers for you to add around your work space here is an image of my computer with the stickers on it.
The feel of the mouse is also a great texture as it is super smooth and comfortable. The down side to this mouse is there is generally nothing bad about it. It comes with the Bluetooth adapter and with a battery and in my opinion it is honestly a great item.
Now it’s competition time. All you have to do to get a chance to get your hands on the Doddle Collection Logitech wireless mouse pictured below is to follow the instructions underneath. It really is that simple. That’s all for now see you next week on my blog takeover.
You will notice that I have been very quiet over the last week. This is because last Friday after 5 years, 2 babies and many memories Gareth and I decided to no longer be together as a couple and to end out relationship. A while ago I wrote about how we had lost our way and unfortunately we still couldn’t find it.
We are the most amazing partnership when it comes to all of the children and they are all thriving and that isn’t just thanks to me but it’s also due to Gareth being part of their lives. When it comes to the kids we are great parents. In fact I would go as far as saying Gareth is one of the most dedicated, incredible amazing parents that I know. There is nothing that he wouldn’t do for every single one of those children.
Unfortunately we aren’t the best at being a couple and this means a lot of bickering and disagreements, spending some nights barely even speaking to each other. We know most couples go through this but when you spend more time not happy than you do happy then something has to give and for us it was getting too much. We have decided to make this split. Nobody knows what the future holds and nobody knows if this split is permanent or if it is temporary. Who knows we may even be back together quickly.
What I do know is that strangely since we took away the pressure of being a couple we are laughing more, talking more and we have found a new respect for each other and I find that exciting for the future. I am confident that we will be back together one day when we are both in a better place and until then we are working together to be the best parents we can possibly be with the children. They all know the situation and we will be still living and going out etc as a family. It’s actually really exciting to re-discover each other and maybe notice the bits of each other than we had lost. Despite the fact we have split. I believe that everything we go through is for a reason and this split will only strengthen our happily ever after and make for a stronger partnership.
Here is a special takeover in Mummyof5miracles “Hand the blog to the kids” segment. This is a special takeover by me, Harry Dodd-Sutton.
Hello everyone, Welcome to my special blog take over. On Thursday 20th July 2017, I finally received my award. If you remember my last blog post Harry takes over week 3 . You will know that I have been nominated to receive an award.
Well I had no idea what it was for until I got there. It turned out to be for my favourite subject. Computer Science. I was so happy when I got up to receive it.
When I went to get it, I was given three prizes.
1) A certificate to show what the award was for and who it was for.
2) A Terry’s Chocolate orange.
3) A strange envelope. When I was given the envelope, I went back to my seat and started to open it. It turned out it was a £5 Tesco voucher. Strange prize but useful.
After an hour-long presentation, We – me, my Mum and my Dad (Gareth) were invited to a buffet and drinks reception to celebrate. The food was amazing with all different items from posh sandwiches to samosas and pizzas, The drinks were Orange juice, Apple juice and wine. We all had juice. My Family met up with one of my friend’s families for the evening. It was a great evening and I am so proud of my award.
Thank you for reading about my award.
I wanted to write to you to give you a talking to!…. what on earth are you playing at? What happened to you and when did you become soft and a bit of a pushover? The Chez I know wouldn’t sit back and take the crap handed to them. The Chez I know wouldn’t let people get to them or drag them down. She also wouldn’t sit there and take anything without putting up a fight.
The new Chez? Well she appears to just take It, time and time again. The new Chez spends hours lay awake thinking about people and conversations that have happened. Trying to figure out what’s wrong with her.
What happened to your motto? “I didn’t know you before I don’t need to know you Now?” Stop letting people grind you down. Be the person you are. Say it how it is and stop letting people walk all over you. This isn’t you, you’re a million times better than this.
Put on your big girl pants, shoulders back, tits out and enjoy life. Love those who love you and those who can’t be bothered because it’s too much effort. Or have nothing but negativity, those who can’t be there when your child is seriously ill or your single-handedly trying to look after 5 kids with your partner sick in hospital don’t deserve to be there now just because they want to know what’s going on. I mean let’s face it most of them didn’t even wish your son a happy birthday.
Be you , people with either love you or hate you for it but stop wasting your time on those who don’t care. If people can’t value your self-worth balls to them
Each week I am handing over my blog to the kids to have their say and let you know whats going on with them. I have told them they can be completely honest and if I have annoyed them or if something has upset them then to just go for it and type how they feel. I figured this way you guys can get to know their personalities and more about who they are as each one of them is completely different.
Harry week 3
Hello everyone welcome to week 3 of my blog takeover. This post i will be talking about awards, year 9 options and the sun.
So this week was sports day at school and the temperature was 28°c. And some idiot (by that i mean me) took sun cream and forgot to put it on so now im sun burnt on my face, neck and pretty much everywhere.The moral of this story is wear sun cream or you could end up looking like me.
Awards. This week i get my academic award. I have to attend an academic award ceremony at the academy i go to school everyday. This is exciting for me because once a term we have an exam week ( a series of exams for different subjects) and last time Ellie got top of the year and it seemed like she got all the attention. I’m glad its my turn because i worked so hard to get to this point and im glad i did.
I have finally got my options back for year 9 and my GCSEs. I got told im doing Computer Science , Triple science and geography. These are the subjects i really wanted to get. I am also estimated A** in all of my exams.
So that’s a bit of whats going on in my life right now and im not gonna lie im writing this while getting ready for school. See you next week
Please could you introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about yourself.
Hi, thanks for letting me take part in your series. I’m Adam, I’m a 39 yr old father of 3 boys and husband to Caroline. I blog at askyerfather.com (twitter: @askyerfather).
Can you remember when the bullying started for you? Where were you? What happened?
As an adult male i’m only just over 5ft tall so you can imagine how small I was as a kid. One of my earliest memories is of being lured into a cloakroom aged 4 and hung upside down from the coat hook and left there for most of the lunch break. Unfortunately this continued for most of my school life and has even reared it’s head with physically violent bullying in the workplace as an adult. At the same time I spent a lot of time in hospitals being treated for my hearing loss and at Alder Hey Children’s Hospital for my size. It was here that I ran into a few seriously bad people in positions of responsibility. This further marked me out in school as the freak that had to go to hospital because he was so small. All of which made my childhood/teen years pretty miserable as I was being bullied at school, mistreated at hospital (which isn’t very nice and can be fairly traumatic even if everyone is treating you with courtesy).
Can you remember how it made you feel at the time?
Confused, angry and a feeling of helplessness as if the bullying is due to things you can’t control then there is nothing you can really do about it. We like to say that adults will help and side with the bullied and innocent but this is often not the case.
How has bullying affected you in your life and how you are as a person?
I am slow to trust people, it has led to periods of depression my whole life. More importantly, I’ve taken so much bullying that it feels like my resilience has snapped and now I am quick to push back at any form of bullying and am annoyed easily by seeing anyone else needlessly bullying.
If you could change anything about your experience what would it be? What would you do differently? If you could give one piece of advice to somebody who is going through bullying now what would it be?
A hard one this one because we are so often told to speak out, tell an adult etc and often that doesn’t work. Kids seem to intrinsically know this which is why they don’t. It can make it worse. Standing up to them often works but also runs it’s own risks. Bullies are often the charismatic, popular ones and often standing up to them will lead to them turning on the charm and tears and lead to people in authority siding with them and making out that you are the one at fault. I’ve tried various methods over the years with varied success,, depending on the situation.
My child has recently begun to be bullied by a teacher !! It’s hard to prove, even harder to be acted upon so my advice to anyone being bullied would be that revenge is a dish best served cold. Surround yourself with a small group of true friends and don’t give much concern for others. Popularity is fleeting. Then document, document, document EVERYTHING. If you don’t let on that you are so hurt and stay out of the bully’s way as much as possible they’ll slip up. When you can’t avoid them and have to stand up for yourself,
having previous documentation will help against any come back on you.Thank you so much for sharing your story with us Adam, I believe you are the first man to come forward and speak out on our campaign and I hope in doing this it gives other men or boys the confidence and encouragement to try to help or do something about it.
I am looking for more people to share their stories for our series, you can read more about it in the following post or email me.
Santa, Reindeer, Candy Canes, Lights , Carols, Presents, Turkey, Crackers you name it I LOVE it. I am completely and utterly obsessed with Christmas and everything that comes with it. I have lost count the amount of times I have been tagged on social media in things to do with Christmas, I have a large array of friends and even those I don’t speak to very often will see something Christmas and immediately think of me. I think its awesome!!!!
My Thoughts on Christmas in july?
Well what an absolutely incredibly fantastic idea!!! I am known for singing Christmas carols in June and driving everyone insane, so the fact that people now celebrate Christmas in July is just brilliant! I could barely contain my excitement when a friend informed me that Movies 24 was turning to Christmas films throughout July. In fact to begin with I thought it was just for the week and then when I realised it was for the whole month I was like a child!
I’ve already watched loads of them poor Gareth has to sit through them all and I’ve also recorded plenty ready for when its no longer Christmas in July and I can sit and watch them. I’ve only just realised that they actually hold Christmas in July Events!!! How awesome is that!
So why the obsession?
Some people buy shoes , clothes shop, wear make up, sing, dance etc to cheer themselves up , I do it with Christmas! If life’s getting a little tough for me I don’t grab for the bottle of wine, I settle myself in a nice bath with a bath bomb and a Christmas book. I don’t know what it is about them that helps me to feel better but whenever I read a book or watch a movie I get a warm and fuzzy feeling inside me. I am generally at my happiest during the time of year that usually causes everyone stress.
I think there is nothing better than sitting there in your nice warm house on a freezing winters evening, burning a festive candle, hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows in hand whilst watching a Christmas film. People just seem nicer and much more kind in winter. Not only that but in the winter it’s acceptable to sit in your pj’s and hibernate a little bit.
I blame the parents
My parents were never Christmas obsessed like I am but they did make a big deal of making sure that it was magical and festive for us. I don’t remember a single bad Christmas, and do you know what else? It’s not even the presents I remember, the memories I have are of us playing board games, watching films, spending time together, sitting round the table for turkey with our hats on reading out dodgy jokes.
I want my kids to have that very same festive feeling. I want them to look back on their childhood Christmas’s and winter and have nothing but happy and fond memories. Already the older ones are following in my footsteps and when asked what their favourite time of year is they will all tell you that it is winter.
We have some little traditions too
If I have a car at Christmas time ( not very often might I add) then I like to take the children to somewhere called Haughton, it’s a tiny little village not to far away from my house and they all decorate their houses and make it all magical. We will then come home where they will open a present. This is ALWAYS pj’s. They then have baths and get into their new pj’s before we sit and watch a film with hot chocolates. We then sprinkle reindeer food outside so that the reindeer know where to go and keep an eye out for Santa’s sleigh before going back inside to set out a plate for the man in the big red suit. Then the children go to bed whilst myself and Gareth sit and finish wrapping the last of the gifts and have a little glass of wine.
On Christmas morning there is always a gift on the ends of their beds and it is always a colouring book and pens. This is something I have done ever since my eldest Harry was a baby and it will continue until they have their own babies.
Thanks for sharing a tiny insight into my obsession with me 🙂